{"product_id":"joe-jurassic","title":"Joe Jurassic","description":"\u003cdiv class=\"a-expander-content a-expander-partial-collapse-content\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003eOne Man. One Dream. Zero Credibility.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhen Buck Joseph, former monster truck driver turned “dino-entrepreneur,” opens \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eThunder Valley Dino-tainment Park\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, he promises thrills, spills, and a hands-on encounter with creatures that definitely should not exist.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eArmed with a leash, a lighter, and way too much confidence, Buck’s roadside empire is a glitter-soaked disaster barely holding together. But when a baby T-Rex bites his hand off during a livestream, the internet crowns him king of e-reptile dysfunction—and reality TV comes knocking.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSoon, Buck is wrestling fame, prehistoric livestock, and a teeny raptor with diva energy, all while the park teeters on the edge of total combustion.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWith sponsors bailing, chaos rising, and his dreams literally going up in smoke, Buck has one last shot:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003eA live, pay-per-view dinosaur battle royale.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause in Thunder Valley, extinction is just a marketing strategy.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e1-star\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003e\"You get what you pay for, and apparently I paid for tetanus.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e—\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eBrenda L., Fort Worth, TX\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBrought my twins for the “Raptor Petting Zoo.” Left with a strong suspicion those weren’t actual raptors. One of them hissed “Karen” at me before stealing my purse. Security offered me a coupon for a churro. The churro was also a mistake.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e3-star\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003e\"Chaos. Mayhem. A surprising amount of glitter.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e—\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eDerek S., Albuquerque, NM\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you like your dinosaurs with side-eye and sideboob, this is the place. The T-Rex had a mullet and what I \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003ethink\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e was a grill. Pretty sure the Triceratops was vaping. My kids had the time of their lives. My wife has not spoken to me since.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e1-star\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003e\"Saw a dino fight a raccoon over a funnel cake. Would not return.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e—\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eLinda M., Sarasota, FL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe velociraptor had a nose ring and kept trying to sell me crypto. Buck rode in on a Segway dressed as a Flintstone and shouted “Welcome to the THUNDERDOME!”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e5-star\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003e\"So bad it looped back around to amazing.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e—\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eKyle W., Austin, TX\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWas it safe? No.\u003cbr\u003eWas it sanitary? Also no.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e2-star\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003e\"Dino-sized disappointment.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e—\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eTanya B., Tulsa, OK\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe stegosaurus photobombed our family portrait by vomiting behind my husband. Somehow, still better than Chuck E. Cheese.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e5-star\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003e\"A spiritual journey.\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e—\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eEthan G., Portland, OR\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWent ironically. Stayed unironically. Buck signed my forehead with a Sharpie and whispered “We’re all extinct on the inside.” 10\/10 would emotionally unravel here again.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Jamie K Schmidt","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47608988500124,"sku":"979-8288478550","price":20.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0749\/4929\/6284\/files\/JoeJurassic.png?v=1789512469","url":"https:\/\/www.mysistersshelf.com\/products\/joe-jurassic","provider":"My Sister's Shelf","version":"1.0","type":"link"}